I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
