So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
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i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
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My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
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