I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
