their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
This girl is more easily done than said...
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize
