Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize
