So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
tell me about the eggs
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