if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
operation harelip BJ is a go
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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