OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
