And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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