even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
