I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize