I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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