if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize