windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It was a blind-side dick pic.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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