and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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