Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
