what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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