mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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