i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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