When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
