There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
