for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
you will always have a special place in my vag
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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