idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
