Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
