this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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