garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
