I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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