Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
