Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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