Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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