I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You're a waste of cheezeits
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
