What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
