first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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