this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
You need a sexual gate keeper
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
