Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
