i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize