oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
