we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
that's an acceptable place to lick
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
