The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
