Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize