Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
