I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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