hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
