We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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