maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize