break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
We have so much sex to catch up on
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
