My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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