So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
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Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.