Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Randomize