Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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