One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
